Thursday, November 15, 2007

Stop!

Somebody please make the world stop so I can catch up!

I am so frustrated.

I am frustrated because I have so many things I want to write about here, yet I can't seem to get my thoughts put into coherent sentences when I have time to write.

I am frustrated because I'm not making much progress on my new career. People are not calling me back and I'm getting discouraged because I only have my lunch hour every day to work on this.

I am frustrated because I have realized I will need a new "regular" job while my new career is getting started and I'm not having any luck. I had a great interview last week, for what would have been a great job doing something I've done before that I loved. However, the administrator informed me that she's making lots of changes, and I would be responsible for implementing said changes....and that the other employees had been there 9+ years and were already resenting the changes so the environment would be "uncomfortable" for me. Um...no thanks, I don't want to deal with that.

I am frustrated because I want a baby and my husband wants to wait a few months before we start trying. I'm getting older and don't want to wait!

I am frustrated because I feel as if life is passing me by while I wait for it to happen. I don't want that.

I am VERY frustrated because my beloved band is touring next year for the first time in four years, and we have a new fan club that sucks so I've only been able to get 11th row tickets. The worst seats I've ever had for their concerts were 6th row. This may sound petty, but going to these concerts is a little escape for me and it makes me so happy. And...matchbox indirectly led me to Italy. I never would have gone to Italy if I hadn't been invited that first time by friends I've met through this music. The ordeal over the sucky tickets has become very nasty, and luckily the fan club is working on possible rememdies to the situation. Let's hope it doesn't become all Hannah Montana! lol

And yes, I also managed to use the name of another matchbox twenty song as my post title.

6 comments:

Roam2Rome said...

Aww..

So there's a man that loves you, married you, and wants to have a baby with you in a few months...

So you dooo have a career that will be lifting off soon..

So you're going to the concert, and are not far from the front at all!

Mmm, I'm not married, no kids for years to come... 6 years of med school up ahead, plus 3 years of tortuous residency, starving (older) student with no chance of going to up front seat concerts... and I happily think I'm lucky! :)

Hang in there :) Look at things from a different perspective, since from my view, you life looks very pretty indeed..

Kathy said...

Yes, you are right. I'm just in a whiny, PMS-y mood today, and feel like complaining!

Sometimes I need to get it all off my chest, then I'm able to step back and calm down.

I'm glad I have you around as a good voice of reason! :-)

nyc/caribbean ragazza said...

I understand (I wanted kids but seeing how I was single and broke that was not going to happen).

I used to feel my life was passing me by. The last company I worked for shut down two weeks before Christmas and we rec'd only 2 weeks severence. I was not a happy person.

It's hard when you in this state to see the positives. Try to take some time out for yourself this weekend. You have a lot on your plate and on your mind.

I hope things start to get better soon.

Kathy said...

Thanks NYC! I know that, overall, I have a pretty good life...I'm just feeling a bit overwhelmed right now.

I'd say it's a good thing your company shut down - look at you now, your book is pretty much done and you are getting ready to move to Rome!

My husband is leaving for a few days right after we have Thanksgiving dinner. I am going to spend three entire days doing nothing but things I want to do, and relaxing! :-)

Annika said...

Well Kathy, just like you said yourself: Sometimes the bad things that happen actually turn out to be for the better. I know all about how it feels when the world is spinning so fast that you can barely hang on to it, but, think like this: Things happen for a reason. So, there is a reason for why you can't get a hold of people, there is a reason why you didn't get that job, and so on. The reason can be really difficult to see though...

Perhaps (and I'm only guessing here) the career you wanted to pursue wasn't the right one, and that's why people aren't returning your calls etc. But by trying to get in touch with them and by trying to pursue the new career, you're making some critical changes in your life that will open new doors that you may not see right now but that you are meant to go through in time.

We are lead in different directions throughout our lives, but the goal is rarely obvious.

And if you manage to make any sense out of this, then congrats to you because to me it sounds really confusing :D

jessica said...

kathy...sometimes everything happens at once, good or bad or a mix. hang in there. i like roam2rome's perspective.
relax, life happens.
hugs,
jessica